Thanks for coming back for more abu–err, I mean more great advice and answers to all your burning, smoldering and lukewarm questions.
Here’s our first email:
Dear Beer Abby–
There was a glut of superhero movies this year. Between Green Hornet, Green Lantern, Thor, X-Men and Captain America (not to mention Transformers, which is about superhero robots), my budget (and patience) were tapped out! Now they’ll all be out on DVD and Blu-Ray. How do I choose which to actually buy?
Hey, man, what do you have against superheroes? No one griped when we had eight stupid Hairy Pottass flicks, or a half dozen unfunny “romantic comedies” or horror flicks about ghosts and vampires, or a dozen documentaries. Why would you single out kickass hero flicks? Don’t be a dick.
To the second part of your question, yeah, they’re all worth seeing again along with the special features (except maybe Green Lantern, which had a pretty lame-o story). And I can’t afford to buy all those DVDs either. What sucks is you can’t just rent ‘em or watch on Nutflex or whatever because now those a-holes have special “rental versions” with NO special features! So like everything else, they’re forcing us to go online and find it all for free. I’m sure there will be lots of lawbreakers uploading those special features, so just search YouTube or Google till you find them and watch everything for FREE. Then maybe they’ll give us back our full rental copies!
I read that you’re turning 25 this year. You look a lot older but act a lot younger, like an immature high schooler. What’s the dilly, yo?
I think you just insulted me. But yeah, even though my comic didn’t show up till 1993, I first appeared in Pascale’s stupid sketchbook in 1986. So screw you–I feel younger than you probably look! Put down those brittle Golden Age rags and buy some awesome 90s BRUs, dude!
Bruvolution? The very first two drawings of me, followed by nearly a year later when I looked more like my handsome self. Took Pascale that long to get me right! (That five years of art school and fancy BFA finally paid off.)
Why do so many drivers put their turn signal on AFTER they move into the left -or right-turn lane? That makes no sense. The turn signal is supposed to let others know you’re leaving your current lane. Once you’ve moved into a turning lane, if’s pretty obvious you’re turning, right?
It’s because drivers fall into two categories: Idiots and A-holes. Too many of the first drive the rest of us crazy!
Why can’t Pascale draw as good as the other guys on the Web site? Can’t he see he sucks?
Eric David Nickrich
Art is in the eye of the beholder. Obviously Pascale needs a new prescription for his glasses. Besides, he’s cheap so you get more than what you pay for. Once he gets famous and hit by a bus, you’ll be sorry you didn’t get a commission!
Rats. We’re done already. Send me more queries, you queeries, dearies and learies!
See ya next time. Hit me up at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Enjoy yourself but not in public.
DISCLAIMER: Bru-Hed is not a licensed anything. In fact, he’s not real (but please don’t tell him). All information herein is meant for entertainment purposes only. All material sent to the address above becomes the property of Schism Comics and All Ages Media, and will be considered acceptable for publication. We reserve the right to edit all letters for space and whatever else. Bru-Hed created by Mike Pascale. Artwork by M.P. and Dean Armstrong.