All original written content is (c) 2018 Mike Pascale. Visual content is (c) its respective owners. Bru-Hed art & character is ©2012 and a trademark of All Ages Media and Mike Pascale.
THIS WEEK: The next installment of Star Lord vs. dinosaurs! This time, a volcano is destroying the Jurassic island so Ben Lockwood (James Cromwell)’s Foundation hires dinosaur activist Claire Dearing (Bryce Dallas Howard), Franklin Webb (Justice Smith), Zia Rodriguez (Daniella VAMPIRE DIARIES Pineda) and Claire’s former beau Owen Grady (Chris Pratt) to fly in and rescue Blue (the smart raptor from the first JURASSIC WORLD) and some of her pals. But surprise! Things go horribly wrong and and Evil White Corporate Guys only make it worse.
Written by Derek Connolly and Colin Trevorrow from characters by Michael Crichton. Directed by J.A. Bayona.
- Surprise! Action abounds. After an opening drama, it slows a bit but then there’s almost all action once it gets going. The pulmonary-pounding chases are back, along with breath-beating close calls, visual-violating explosions and auditory-annihilating roars. More excitement and thrills than before.
- Casting is fine. Pratt is good (as usual) and has decent chemistry with Howard’s Claire. Smith is great comic relief as Nancy-boy nerd Franklin. Toby (CAPTAIN AMERICA) Jones is always good as a bad business-type. Points for young newcomer Isabella Sermon as Lockwood’s granddaughter Maisie, whose strong, scared and resourceful all at once. Jeff Goldblum is always great as Ian Malcolm, though it’s only for a cameo. A previous baddie returns.
- As you’d expect by now, the creatures and effects are tops and terrific. This one lives up to and even surpasses the previous JURASSIC WORLD. The big dramatic sequence with the clear gyro ball (seen in the trailer) is like a first-person amusement part ride. [MIKE: The surfacing and weight added to the dinosaurs are definitely the best yet. Same with the anatomical movements and such. I’m no expert on their historical accuracy, but as a viewer, you’d think most of the dinosaurs are moving props rather than CG.]
- Literally tons upon tonnage of dinosaurs (and not just from the Jurassic period either). Big ones, baby ones, cute ones, mean ones, slow and fast ones, fighting and flying ones. Like you need more?
- Bryce Howard in tighty-whitey knit sweater, plus wet shirt, plus belted waste plus tight pants equals happy Bru.
- A few laugh-out-loud moments. And some easter eggs: look for the Jeep side-mirror (“objects are closer…”) nod, Jimmy Buffett sign, and during the news footage at the beginning, watch the bottom crawl for “President questions existence of dinosaurs in the first place.”
- Many bad guys get theirs in nasty ways! Enough for a reel.
- A couple unexpected twists and ending, with room for unlimited milking possibility of the franchise.
- Quick-but-fun button after the end credits (there was none on the previous film)
- The story of corporate greed disregarding safety, hurting animals and destroying the world with genetic engineering is wearing thin by now.
- A few of the plot twists are telegraphed early or easy to figure out. Others come out of nowhere and don’t really add anything other than a, “What was that for?”
- Dinosaur saliva–lots of it. T-Rex blood in the mouth. Triceratops tongue. Goat, dog and people feasts. Eew.
- I wanted to know and see more of the giant undersea beast, whatever it was.
- SUSPENSION OF DISBELIEF DEPT.: 1. If everything around you is chaos and destruction and you have a chance to escape, you take action, not stand and stare (unless the script calls for it). 2. If you’re stowed away in a truck parked in a ship’s cargo hold for a multi-day journey, wouldn’t you have to find liquid, food and a bathroom? I needed all three within the two hours of this movie!
- Sorry, “shippers”–the leads only kiss briefly once and there’s no real resolution to the relationship issue; viewers were expecting something more.
- Two words: Jurassic California?
Even more fun than the last JURASSIC WORLD, with more action and those moments of “OMG, the monster’s gonna get ’em!” that are a blast. Critics are morons–this isn’t something you watch for deep feelings or cultural insights. You want giant nasty dinosaurs, and you get ’em! (Don’t bother with 3-D, although IMAX and D-BOX are probably very cool—you must see it on the big screen before TV. Dinosaurs don’t work on small screens.) I want to ride the next roller coaster made from this one!
P.S.: How about some prehistoric or futuristic ORIGINAL ART? Get some dinos, babes, hunks or whatever you want–Pascale can make you something cool for less than you think. Just ask Craig here!
DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed here are not those of Wednesday’s Heroes, Mike Pascale, the Lockwood Foundation, InGen, the ASPCD (American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Dinosaurs) or IBM (International Bidding Millionaires). Bru would like a pet Ankylosaurus, to help get thru rush hour.