All original written content is (c) 2015 Mike Pascale. Visual content is (c) its respective owners. Bru-Hed is a trademark of All Ages Media and Mike Pascale.
NEWBIES: If this is your first trip here (welcome!), here’s the QT on what these reviews are.
THIS WEEK: The agonized Aussie road warrior (pun intended) once played by Mel Gibson makes his 21st century debut. Max becomes part of a two-hour car chase with a crew-cutted, one-and-a-half-armed Imperiator Furiosa babe while being chased by fat and freakish, Darth-Vader-sounding bad dude Immortan Joe and his equally freakish minions, all driving Frankenstein vehicles across an endless post-apocalyptic desert where people kill for gasoline and water to survive. (Like you need any more reason to see it?)
Written by George Miller, Brandon McCarthy and Nico Lathouris. Directed George Miller.
- The look of the film is awesome! (FROM MIKE: He means the production design.) Yeah, that. The outfits, the vehicles, the environments, structures, equipment, all that crap comes together as one freakish whole that works great with the whole “dustpunk” look. (The first MAD MAX movie probably started dustpunk so it makes sense that this one brings it back with a vengeance.)
- Speaking of vengeance, there’s some here that feels pretty good.
- Casting/Acting is great: Tom Hardy, Charlize Theron, Nicholas Holt and Hugh Keays-Byrne as Max, Furiosa, Nux and Joe, respectively, all take over their characters and make them believable without focusing on the actor. (A contrast to say, Sam Jackson in KINGSMAN: SECRET SERVICE.) Comic book connection: Hardy played Bane in THE DARK KNIGHT RISES and Hoult is Hank McCoy/The Beast in the X-Men flicks (as well as Jack in JACK THE GIANT SLAYER – which Bru-Hed reviewed here.).
- Frankencars! A junkyard lover’s dream: Two ’59 Caddys welded together, a front end of a ’68 or ’69 Barracuda, a body of a 50s Chevy, a 30s roadster, and more, all cobbled together with SUVs, trucks, military vehicles, even tanks! (And of course, the iconic ’74 Aussie Ford Falcon from the original Max flicks.) Easily the most bizarre assortment of automotive transportation of any film I’ve seen. Can’t wait for the Mad Max Car Shows to sweep the nation. Not to mention all the homemade versions from the grease monkey-geeks out there!
- Furiosa is one fierce, fightin’ femme fatale. Even covered with dirt and grease paint, her boobs pressed flatter than flapjacks, fugly Bru hair (looks better on me, Charize, sorry) and a wacky mechanical forearm and hand, she looks cool as she kicks serious butt. She’s the 21st century Ripley and then some. (No frumpy feminist fuddy-duddy can cackle about this lady! HA!)
- Thankfully, there are a few young hotties along for the ride: “Breeders,” as they’re called, just young babes in flimsy wrappings made for mommy-hood to make more warriors. One is preggers, but she still has a nice helmet. (MIKE: That means “head” in sexist Bru-speak.) I can do without the spiked chastity belts, tho.
- The other women shown are milkers; big fatties with giant love pillows hooked up to milking machines to provide continuous nourishment to the warrior-boys. (I am not makin’ this up!) That’s about as close to nudity as this gets, but you won’t forget that first close up of mammary mountains!
- Speakin’ of wimmen, thankfully there are no rape scenes like their were in a couple of the original MMs. (Babes be for lovin’ not shovin’, I always say.) (MIKE: Yeah, he’s a regular Sir “Gala-hed.”)
- BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! Things get blowed up real good. Cars and people explode all over the place. Passengers thrown every which way. Car crashes everywhere. Guns and knives galore. Flying and flaming motorcycles. Wild fights on moving vehicles. Makes FURIOUS 7’s acrobatics look easy.
- Music with your mayhem! One rig has no less than four drummers pounding away on the back of the truck, plus a guitar player chained to the front jamming away on an “axe” that’s really an axe—complete with massive speaker stack mounted on the hood. Rock around the shock!
- For all you punks under 35 that think 50 is old, chew on this: the director of this monster is 70 YEARS OLD. And he shot for months in 3000 miles of African desert. Next time you see a graybeard, think of that before you start yer snarkin’ and snickerin’.
- Super-simple storyline. Point A to B without getting wasted. And then things get turned around and another chase begins. Turn off your brain and pass the popcorn!
- Did I mention the Frankencars?
- If you’re lookin’ for plot twists, deep meanings, witty banter, solitaries (MIKE: he means, “soliloquies’), romance, surprise reveals and twist endings, you’re in the wrong theater. There is character development, connection and allegorical crap for those egghead-types who see “the human condition” in a piece of toast, but for the rest of us mortals, this is a chase-action flick and proud of it.
- Surgery in moving vehicles without anesthetic. Living blood-bags. Umbilical cords. Yuck.
- Slight contradiction with Max: For a guy who’s supposed to be hopeless with nothing to live for, he’s got the survival instinct of a Hulk! Never gives up. Usually the people who have nothin’ to live for aren’t the ones fightin’ the hardest to stay alive. But maybe we’ll find out more in the next installment (and their better be one).
- This puts the “apocalyptic” in “post-apocalyptic.” So if you’re sensitive to blood and violence and hopeless environments, you’ll want to see a Disney flick instead.
- Don’t try this at home: Spray-painting your mouth silver, spitting gasoline into a speeding car’s air intake while squatting on the hood, tying your budding to the front of your car, hanging 20 feet in the air from poles attached to a moving car, and pretty much everything else you see here.
- Guys, probably not a date movie. Unless she’s covered with tats, piercings and rides rusted Harleys.
Everything you need to know is in my first paragraph—a two-hour car chase! Featuring fire, freaks, foxy femmes and fanatically furious fights! What more could ya want? (Okay, maybe robots and monsters, but then it would have gotten weird.) Not only must you see this on the biggest screen possible to be part of the action, you should buy the DVD for all the inevitable “making of” and behind the scenes stuff that will be worth every penny. Max is madder than ever!
P.S.: Pascale is a freak hisself. He draws ‘em too. Plus babes and cars. Want one of yer own? Just ask Craig here!
DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of Wednesday’s Heroes, Mike Pascale, Marvel Studios, S.H.I.E.L.D., Hydra, Joss Whedon, Buffy, the Serenity crew, streetwalkers, teenagers, speedsters, whizzers, flashes, witches, Warlocks, purple titans, vibranium miners or anyone else in comics or movies. The next Avengers is the INFINITY WAR, which Bru thinks has battling Japanese cars.